Dear Joe,

It is really good to know that there is someone like you out there, ever ready to listen and help out people like me. Joe, my problem started when I realized that my one and only crush can never be a real part of my life just because of the unmistakable fact that he is gay.

Joe, I’m in the height of my teen years. Being an active member of the youth ministry in our parish, I really got hooked up with all the activities in the church and the friends I’ve gained. Two years ago, I met Jiggy. He’s really a very attractive young man. A head-turner, you may say. He studies in an exclusive-boy school and is really doing good as well. He is very sweet and a very nice person.

Perfect. It’s just that, yes, he is gay. Undeniably true and a typical one. Would you believe he giggles every time a cute guy passes by? But because of his packaged personality and well being, I continued and chose to like him.

But Joe, things became different two months ago. Jiggy and I became really close. We talked endlessly over the phone. He goes to our house, especially when there are no classes. He blurted out one day that he wanted to court me. Joe, it was a major shock because, who would expect that a renowned gay would say such words? It crossed me, is this for real? Is he willing to change for me? Is this a joke? Secondly, I simply didn’t know what to say. I asked for time to think about it after he assured and re-assured me that he will change.

Because I had so much hope, I turned down every suitor I had. And yes, I did give him a chance. He said he will prove his sincerity and love for me. He turned out to be an extra special person. He was able to do what a normal guy would do but, I am thinking, is he using me as front for his real identity? He is the only one who knows himself.

One day, he unconsciously screamed when his “guy-crush” passed by. Joe, this was the time I was starting to fall for him. I was so disappointed and depressed. Why?! Life is so unfair. I already have the ultimate crush of my life, who doesn’t even know his identity. After this incident, he promised again that he would change. He said he was only surprised and that it didn’t mean anything. Joe, help me. Should I trust him and give him another chance? Should I love someone who cannot even understand his own self?

Thank you for taking time to read my letter. Joe, please play the song “Forever More” by Side A. Jiggy, I hope you soon know what you want in life, who you are and where you belong. More power to Love Notes.

Sincerely,
Aileen